The Theory of Frienship Between the Sexes

This might turn into a rather lengthy scientific paper, but you guys deserve something after Cam and I didn't really posting anything all of finals week.

The Theory of Friendship Between Sexes

This is a theory I've been working on for quite a while. Thesis Statement: Friendship between boys and girls is always in a state of homeostasis. Perhaps you remember homeostasis from freshman biology when we studied the deer population on an island. The population would get really big really fast, but then there wasn't enough food so they all died except for the few who could find food and reproduced and then the population got really big again and then they all died again because they couldn't find food and so on and so forth and do you like my run on sentence?

Point is, it would go up and then go back down. Being friends generally works the same way. We meet someone new, our relationship improves with them, keeps getting better and better until we have an argument or get tired of them or don't see them anymore, and then the relationship weakens. It can be represented in this graph:

As you can see, there is another line on this graph. It represents what I will call it the Intergender Cap Upon Pals (ICUP for short). The ICUP line is basically a glass ceiling. It is impossible for any relationship to get higher than ICUP line. When a relationship reaches it's highest point, it is impossible for it to get any higher, so anything you do, whether perfect or not, makes your relationship begin a downward trend. It's like when you have a really high A+...like a 120%. Even if you get a 100% on everything that you do for the rest of the grading period, your grade is still going to go down. You just can't sustain that high of a grade even if you do it perfectly.

There is one exception to this rule. The only way to get over the ICUP line is if it becomes a romantic relationship. Since a romantic relationship is pretty much based off of friendship, it basically follows the same trends that friendships do, only when they reach their peak, they keep going. When romantic relationships go down on the graph, they hopefully do not fall back below the ICUP line. This often results in breakups and divorces.

Since homeostasis is a self regulating force, it is important to notice that the higher a relationship becomes on the graph and the faster and steeper that the graph goes up, whether the growth is over a short period of time or a long period of time, the faster and steeper the graph should come down. Everything is proportional. The bigger they are the harder they fall. That's why when you have a romantic relationship that ends in break ups or divorce, it's always bad.

Of course, no relationships travel in straight lines. They move a lot like the stock market. One day they're up, one day they're down. But over time a general trend can be seen, just like in relationships.

It's also important to note that this theory DOES NOT apply among guys. Friendships (men do not have relationships with other men) generally are much straighter. The peaks are higher, the troughs are lower, the spaces in between are not nearly as steep. The application of this theory in relationships between girls remains unproven. The data collected from girl girl relationships is inconclusive. Relationships among females show eratic shifts in the relationship graph for no reason at all. Further study will be needed to make a conclusive thesis.

I welcome comments and questions about my theory. Being scientists, you may now all test my theory to see if it holds true. I would also love some data about girl friendships.